God no words

there are no words to describe how awesome God is!!!!!! today i was praising him soo much and i saw him in sitting on his throne and i did not want to stop praising him... just talking about how wonderful he is... makes me sooooo happy!!!!! :o) SANTO ES EL!!!!

a song for my fam/friends who need God

"Here I Go Again"
Father, hear my prayer
I need the perfect words
Words that he will hear
And know they're straight from You
I don't know what to say
I only know it hurts
To see my only friend slowly fade away

So maybe this time
I'll speak the words of life
With Your fire in my eyes
But that old familiar fear is tearing at my words
What am I so afraid of?

'Cause here I go againTalkin 'bout the rain
And mulling over things that won't live past today
And as I dance around the truth
Time is not his friend
This might be my last chance to tell him
That You love Him
But here I go again, here I go again

Lord, You love him so, You gave Your only Son
If he will just believe; he will never die
But how then will he know what he has never heard
Lord he has never seen mirrored in my life

This might be my last chance to tell him
That You love him
This might be my last chance to tell him
That You love him
You love him, You love him

What Am I so afraid What am I so afraid
What am I so afraid of?
How then will he know
What he has never heard

psalm 119

"I will speak of your testimonies also before kings and will not be ashamed. " my friend from church told me to read psalms 119 and i asked her why and she said i do not know what you will get from it.... so i read it and it was as if God was speaking to me! because the whole chapter is about keeping the commandments and giving your testimonies! but i hate giving my testimony especially in front of church! i'm sooo shy and nervous and i always cry lol but he was telling me that "I will speak of your testimonies also before kings and will not be ashamed. " So even to kings i will give my testimony on how God has changed my life and will not be ashamed. so i gave my testimony in front of church and then they picked me to pray about keeping the commandments in front of the whole church! it was crazy how God talks to us! he is soo awesome! and its nice to hear later on when ppl come up to me and tell me how my testimony touched them :o)

having a lil bit of faith can save you

in church this message touched me completely! why should i doubt about wat God can do in my life?!?!!? having a lil bit of faith saves sooo many ppl... believing in God is about having faith... knowing there is someone there without seeing him... loving him wit all ur heart without seeing him... in the bible this woman was sick for 12 yrs where she would not stop bleeding from her private part and she was rich that she was able to go to all these doctors but no one cured her... when Jesus was passing by her city and she believed that by just touching his garment she would be cured and she was!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jesus said who touched me... was he was in a crowd of people a lot of ppl where touching him.... but since this woman had faith... power left his body and he told her... stand up... for your faith has cured you go in peace.... PRAISE GOD I LOVE HIM AND HE LOVES U TOO!!!

BACK IN THE DAYS!

my babies are going to be gorgeous and adorable!

wedding plans!

its soooooooo crazy but in a yr i am going to have my big wedding! so this means i need to start soon to start planning my wedding so i dont go crazy by the end of next yr! the key point is to plan a cheap wedding!!! so i'm wondering... wat would be good colors for bridemaids dresses.... do they have to match the flowers? the flowers are going to be fall color: red, orange, and yellow. i do not know ... so many questions... only 1 year to do it all... i think i might start stressing! my biggest problem is that will we have enough money to even have this big wedding? please pray for us! :o)

x-mas tree

i am sooooooooooo excited cuz we just got our x-mas tree!!! its 6 feet tall and its real... it smells soo good!

yay and its my one month anniversary of being married wow time flies!!!

thanksgiving pics

i love my husband

my new family

my cousin Jenny (from derwin's side lol)

I'M BACK!!!

so i have sooo much to say so let me just start! thanksgiving was amazing!!! i truly did marry into the bestest family ever.... derwin family is sooo awesome and soo loving and boy do they know how to cook a turkey!! and their corn bread was delicious!!! and my mommy made gallo pinto it was soooo good! i got to spent time wit my mommy i was soo happy but since she had my uncles over she was stressing playing host... pobrecita!

BLACK FRIDAY WAS CRAZY!!! i thought it was crazy and full of ppl last yr in gainesville but it was nothing compared to miami where there were thousands and thousands of ppl!!! did i mention there were thousands!!! but we got great stuff soooo i was very happy but sleepy!

my mother in law and i were already to go to the movies together without derwin and got really close :o)

i got to see helena and the baby.... he is not a baby anymore he is soooooo huge!!! and no matter how much time has pass or how old she gets (22 this yr!) she will always be my tigger!

then coming back from a great thanksgiving i came home to get sick... being dizzy and throwing up and no i'm not pregnant thank u very much... just a virus called vetro i think lol

granted

have u ever thought that u take ur life for granted?!?!? this friday in church it was sooo sad about the ppl we were praying for... a woman from church her son went to mexico on vacation and a truck crashed into him and now they are going to have to cut off his legs! it was sooo heart breaking i was praying soo much for him that i felt his pain and broke down and cried and cried because its soo sad to think that during ur vacation... something so terrible like that would happened and u r gonna have to lose both of ur legs! i was praying for God to give him the courage to understand things and to see light in the darkness and that if they still have not cut off his legs i pray that God would help him walk away because our lord is sooo powerful that wit a touch of his finger he would be cured!!! then we were also praying for ppl who had cancer! it was sooo sad how much ppl have cancer and tumors! its horrible to imagine all those ppl! i give thanks to MY HEAVENLY FATHER that i do not even have a cold and some ppl are dying! please pray for those ppl who are sick... for that boy who might have his legs cut off and continue to seek our Father because he is our strength, our hope, and gives us the will to carry on wit this corrupted world!

"Do not ask the Lord to guide your footsteps if you're not willing to move your feet."

its true sometimes we want God to solve all our problems and take away our sadness and we want and want and want from God but yet we do not give any in return... is that fair?!?!? lets say not just wit God but if you had a friend that only called u when they needed something and only when they were in trouble and needed your help... would you want to pick up their call or help them out? personally i'm trying to be a better person, but to that friend that only calls me when they need a favor or are in a jam... i'm gonna get tired of picking up their phone calls... especially if when I CALL THEM and they do not want to hear me or just ignore me... i would be soo angry! but our Lord is soo forgiving that he will forgive us but it is not fair for you to call him only when u need help... and when he asks of us.. we are not willing to give back...

if you ask something from God and he does not answer your prayer... maybe you should think about what u r giving to him or if u have ever given anything to him... he wants a relationship wit us... he is my father and he wants his daughter to love him and i do with all my heart but i should not abuse the love my father has for me with only wants and wants instead of needs.... instead of praying for more money, better car, better house... ppl should be grateful to have a home or to have a car even if its not a 2008 lexus... and pray for the people who are homeless.. pray for the children who are hungry... pray for the people who are dying and no one is helping them.... if u say a prayer and its not about ur wants but its about someone else's needs trust me it makes you feel sooo good inside... bcuz u stop thinking just about yourself and u think about other ppl who need a lot more prayers than u do.... and remember to give back to our father by having a relationship wit him through communication... reading the bible... and making a sacrifice like fasting and its sooo amazing how just 3 lil things can change ur life! and our God will not feel just used when ppl are in trouble but he will realize that u do love him like he LOVES US :O)

TURKEY

so i got plans of buying forzen turkeys donote them to the children who do not have homes or anything to eat and GOD provided me with the money so i am really excited!!! :o)

NEW LIFE

this weekend i got BAPTIZED and it was amazing!!! i let go of a life full of sadness, loneliness, regrets, and Jesus gave me a whole new life and took away all my sins! he took all my sins and cast them to a sea! i am sooo happy for this opportunity which i didnt think i ever deserved because i at first didnt believe in God but now i Do KNOW that he does exist and is sooo real and continues to touch me!!! :o) i do hope he has big plans for me to do his will because i am ready for whatever battle as long as i get to serve my LORD! may GOD bless you!

Planning our wedding

now i need to start planning our BIG WEDDING for next yr and start finding good prices since i have a whole yr to do it! :o) i'm sooo excited, more than words can tell or explain!

MARRIED

MY LIFE IS LIKE A FAIRY TALE I LOVE MY HUSBAND!!! on last sunday derwin asked my mom and my dad for my hand in marriage and of course their reaction was to ask if i was pregnant and the answer is OF COURSE NOT!!! i have lost 26 pounds (thanks to God) and i do not plan on gaining them right back!!! lol on monday we were supposed to go to dinner to celebrate our one yr anniversary of living together and we could not cuz it was Mac's birthday... and i kept telling derwin that i was not gonna marry him if he did not propose to me lol cuz we had all the plans to get married on sat and still no engagement lol .... but it was all part of his master plan to make me believe he would not propose! so on wed he told me he was gonna work late and i believed him! i even called his cousin who works wit him when derwin would not pick up the phone... they were all in the plan! so on wed nite or on halloween derwin proposed to me in olive garden!!! it was perfect because we were alone in the back and romantic music was playing and he got on one knee and ask me to marry him and of course i started crying :o( lol but it was a happy cry :o) and he told me he was gonna propose on monday but we went to the party instead... so on sat we got married in miami through civil by his uncle and derwin's mom set up the house very nice and had cake and everything was perfect! :o) it was just supposed to be our parents there wit us cuz we wanted to get married for us and to be right in God's eyes. but everyone from derwin family showed up lol but it was awesome and my mom rented us a room at the embassy suites and it was perfect cuz i have never stay in a fancy hotel! :o) and on sunday we went to derwin's aunt surprise birthday party and he introduce me as "HIS WIFE" i love him! :o)

East to West

Lord, please forgive me for my sins. and know that i did not do them to hurt you. i am human and i am weak. i want to be changed and i want to become an instrument used for your will. i really do want to help others for them not to feel hunger, sickness, sadness, hurt, for them never to be miserable and i want to be used to help those who need you! i want to be changed i want to be cleaned i want NO I NEED YOU IN MY LIFE! and i want to thank you for still being by my side and i hope to make you proud some day because all these words are sincere... i want to do your will... please LORD tell me what i need to do... please tell me how to help others not feel lost anymore... i need you

"East To West"

Here I am, Lord, and I'm drowning in your sea of forgetfulness
The chains of yesterday surround me
I yearn for peace and rest
I don't want to end up where You found me
And it echoes in my mind, keeps me awake tonight
I know You've cast my sin as far as the east is from the west
And I stand before You now as though I've never sinned
But today I feel like I'm just one mistake away from You leaving me this way

Jesus, can You show me just how far the east is from the west
'cause I can't bear to see the man I've been come rising up in me again
In the arms of Your mercy I find rest
'cause You know just how far the east is from the west
From one scarred hand to the other

I start the day, the war begins, endless reminding of my sin
Time and time again Your truth is drowned out by the storm I'm in
Today I feel like I'm just one mistake away from You leaving me this way

I know You've washed me white, turned my darkness into light
I need Your peace to get me through, to get me through this night
I can't live by what I feel, but by the truth Your word reveals
I'm not holding on to You, but You're holding on to me
You're holding on to me

Jesus, You know just how far the east is from the west
I don't have to see the man I've been come rising up in me again
In the arms of Your mercy I find rest
'cause You know just how far the east is from the west
From one scarred hand to the otherOne scarred hand to the other
From one scarred hand to the other

Praise You In This Storm

sometimes for no reason i'll feel this complete sadness and just want to cry and cry! or maybe i'm having a bad day and nothing is going my way. i just cry and cry and i feel like no one would understand how i feel. but i know LORD you do... and i wonder when i cry why did you leave me to be so sad but its because "i barely hear Your whisper through the rain, "I'm with you"' and i realize you are with me and i start praying, listening people who praise you and once again i feel happy and complete. i need to realize that i'm just a human no one special... i'm alive today and will be dead tomorrow... but somehow you LORD still care about you... about my silly wants instead of needs and i want to thank you for having patience wit me and i love you and i hope other people will see how POWERFUL your love is and how it can change a life completely for good. :o)


"Praise You In This Storm"
I was sure by now
That You would have reached down
And wiped our tears away
Stepped in and saved the day
But once again, I say "Amen", and it's still raining

As the thunder rolls
I barely hear Your whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away

I'll praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
Every tear I've cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

I remember when
I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry
You raised me up again
My strength is almost gone
How can I carry on
If I can't find YouAs the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away

I lift my eyes unto the hills
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord
The Maker of Heaven and Earth

HAPPY

I'M SOOOOOOOOOOO HAPPY!!! I THINK THIS IS THE HAPPIEST I HAVE EVEN BEEN!!! I WISH I WAS ALREADY IN MIAMI!!! :o) I'M SOOO GRATEFUL FOR GOD'S BLESSING!!!! THANK YOU LORD FOR HOLDING ON TO ME! MAY EVERYONE PRAISE YOUR NAME, GOD ALMIGHTY! :o)

dont want to study

so wats new?!?!?!.... me again does not want to study!!! for my stupid geology test! i hate geology who cares about the earth.... i just want to go to heaven!

miami

i'm going to miami next weekend which is awesome because it is the only weekend i'll get to relaxe without having a test that upcoming week! and i'll finally get to see my mama, my family, derwin's fam, and helena YAY! and its crazy cuz next week derwin and i r going to be celebrating our 1 yr of living together! its insane how we have not killed each other hahaha jk i love my baby.... but i also miss having helena and the girls: luz and luzmary as my roommates cuz at times they were so funny and we def had some random moments hehehe

my new love

so i realized that i have a new love: COCONUT ICE CREAM oh wow its sooooooooooo delicious!!!! tonight i had one and then wanted to have two, then wanted to have three lol basically eat the box but i only ate one cuz then i'll feel fat!!! :o( but the fruit ice cream is only 120 calories compared to a million calories at coldstone lol which i have not been there since Helena's mom invited us to eat there. so yummy! so basically i love all fatty things hahaha but it tastes sooo good!

J-Lo

j-lo is sooooo pregnant... she came on the show dancing with the stars and oh yea she is pregnant wit A HUGE BUMP AND EVEN BIGGER CLOTHES!!!! but its funny how silly she is wearing those high heels and rumors have it that she is pregnant wit twins... she needs to stop and wear flip flops hahaha lol but good luck to her and hopefully all comes out well! J-LO CALL ME so i can go to the babyshower hahaha

Saving the World

ok so now i feel like i want to save the world! i want for child not to be hungry, i want for women and children not to be trafficked and turned into sex slaves, i want to pick up the trash so nature does not look so nasty and dirty, i want to go to different countries and help build churches and/or orphanages, and most importantly i want for people to know about Jesus and his words and beliefs and for them to know how much he loves us! i'm in a mood like lets go somewhere lets help someone or at least give a smile to a stranger it wont cost any harm but it might bring a smile on their face. i want for the holidays to give feed to the homeless i'm such in a giving mood i dont know why! but i'm happy but i need as much help as i can get to save the world so whoever is with me.... hop on!!! :o) YAY

Abre los ojos de mi alma

ABRE LOS OJOS DE MI ALMA
ABRE MIS OJOS SENOR
YO QUIERO VERTE
YO QUIERO VERTE

i love that song from church and what we learned tonite is that JESUS is always with us so never be sad because he promised he was going to be with us until the ends of our days! and no matter who we talk to, our friend, our partner, their relationships will never compare to the relationship you will have with THE LORD. AMEN!

Shar Jackson

On Thursday night’s episode, Jackson, 31, performed her original rap “Let it Blow.” About halfway through the song, she rapped, “They should’ve had me open up on the VMAs,” referring to Spears' dismal Video Music Awards performance, and the crowd erupted into cheers.

when i saw her perform her song and she said that about the VMAs i started jumping up and down saying NO SHE DIDNT it was awesome!!! i'm sorry for brittany but brittany did take shar man while she was 8 months pregnant so i guess she was allow to speak her mind hahahahaha it was awesome and now for everything i keep saying "they should have had me open up on the VMAs!!! lol

yes i am crazy hahahahahaha

BE CAREFUL!

BE CAREFUL OF THE SATAN!!! what i learned today is that satan was the most beautiful angel that GOD created and the third in line. he was after JESUS, so satan is very powerful. and the devil can present himself to u as an angel of light... so be careful if an angel ever shows up to u and if he tells you to bow down to him (its the satan) or if he tells you something that is sinful or against the bible its the satan!.... the only way we can defeat the devil is by knowing verses from the bible... an important one is psalm 23 "The lord is my shepherd, I shall not want. He makes me to lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside the still waters. He restores my soul, he leads me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake. Yeah, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me, your rod and your staff, comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies, you anoint my head with oil, my cups runs over. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life and I will dwell in the house of THE LORD FOREVER."

satan is beautiful its not a scary lil creature wit a tail so do not let beauty deceive u!!! or take you away from the LORD or his words! know that GOD is the truth and how my future father-in-law loves to say, GOD is the alpha and the omega he is everlasting! put your faith in the LORD and you shall live forever! :o)

amazing!

after bible study its sooo true.... it makes u feel amazing!!! and PRAISE THE LORD for sending mara to help me realize my hunger for THE LORD!!! and i learned that i want to marry GOD!!! he is merciful, just, THE TRUTH, and love and he will never change!!! would we not want a man who will NEVER change?!?! he will continue to be perfect and love us for ever and ever? he is there to listen to us and only want what is best for us because he gave up his only son for the love he has for us?!?!? what other man will ever love us more than THE LORD! this is why i am going to marry THE LORD because he loves me and i love him! and i'll also marry derwin if its god's will but THE LORD will be my #1 god willing!

desperate housewives!

so season three was pretty lame but man season four is good!!! i really want to know wat happened to that girl's dad and why did she lose her memory and i want to know if bree will pull off raising the baby as her own and wat is going to happened to eddi, she is going to be killed? is gaby and carlos finally gonna get back together? basically i have a lot of questions and i dont want to wait a week.... i want the answers right now!!!

Story

my mom told me about an email that she received from my cousin about a story that a married couple were fighting in front of their 5 year old daughter. the father shot his wife and then killed himself and left their daughter there. their neighbor which was a christian woman took her in and raised her as her own, and she took her to a christian school and told the people there to have patience with her because her family was not religious and she was never exposure to any of this. so one day the teacher was talking about Jesus and show a picture to the little girl and asked if she knew who that was... she said yes, he was hugging me when my parents were fighting. :o) (message learned that the lord will always be there for us during our hard times!)

another story that my mom told me was about a mother whose son died from cancer at a young age. the mother was yelling and screaming and asked god where were you when my son was dying?!?!? then a letter fall from heaven and it was from her son. it said... god lend me a piece of paper and pen and only you can see what i wrote and god wanted to let you know that when you asked where he was... he was bringing me to heaven and taking away my pain. i am in a better place now.. more peaceful and i will protect you aways from here. god was with me during all my painful moments and he took them away. (when she read this one to me it made me cry and message learned is to never blame god because he is always there to take away our pain!)

never ending

tests tests and more tests they r just never ending!!!!!! i have one tomorrow, one next tues, and another one on the following tuesday!!!! why cant i just be a lazy person for a whole week without worrying about another test!!! and if i dont have a test then i have papers due left and right or a combination of the two and yes i'm a bit frustrated and more like a bit tired!!! :o( i just wanna go down to miami i'm really missing my mommy!!! and maybe i could also visit helena and the baby yay but i cant wanna know y... cuz i have more tests!!! anyways... did anyone see I LOVE NEW YORK 2 last night?!?! lol they were giving heroes! lol

5 more mins

its soo funny because everytime i have class at 8:30am i'm always thinkin 5 more mins so it goes from being 7am to 8:05am and i'm late to class lol so in between my 5 more mins i had a dream that my friend helena came over to visit me with her baby and my lil brother was younger and he was trying to take care of jayden from not falling down the stairs because at that time... jayden was learning how to walk! and then derwin and i went the movies to see a comedy and this man was telling us not to laugh so hard and i got sooo mad telling him if he wanted to he could leave because it was a comedy movie and we had the right to laugh (so much for trying to be peaceful lol) so point being... no more 5 mins even if they do feel like a lil bit of heaven!

St Augustine

this sunday we went to st augustine, Derwin, Jenny (his cousin), Mac (jenny husband), their two sons Stanley and Nathan, and I. Derwin and i celebrated our anniversary of a year and five months and pretty soon we r going to be celebrating our one yr of living together. everything was so nice and prefect!!! it was pretty windy but it was nice we had a picnic then play in the water and nathan was sooo cute!!! when the water would come ....nathan would run cuz he was scared! lol then he was trying to scare the birds and Mac found a crab and was missing with the crab so the crab was trying to bite him lol it was so much fun! then we went to town and ate there then we wanted dessert and everyone got something but derwin and i cuz we wanted candy apply but they didnt have the red apples only chocolate covered green ones yuck lol jk then we got home and fell asleep at 10pm cuz we were so pooped!!! :o)

Marriage

And that a man should leave his father and mother, and be forever united to his wife. The two shall become one—no longer two, but one! And no man may divorce what God has joined together. Matthew 19:5-6, TLB

"And you husbands, show the same kind of love to your wives as Christ showed to the church when He died for her…That is how husbands should treat their wives, loving them as parts of themselves. For since a man and his wife are now one, a man is really doing himself a favour and loving himself when he loves his wife! Ephesians 5:25-28, TLB

"You husbands must be careful of your wives, being thoughtful of their needs and honouring them as the weaker sex. Remember that you and your wife are partners in receiving God's blessings, and if you don't treat her as you should, your prayers will not get ready answers." I Peter 3:7, TLB

"You wives must submit to your husbands' leadership in the same way you submit to the Lord. For a husband is in charge of his wife in the same way Christ is in charge of His body the church. (He gave His very life to take care of it and be its Saviour!) So you wives must willingly obey your husbands in everything, just as the church obeys Christ." Ephesians 5:22-24, TLB

Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God. Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word. That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Nevertheless let everyone of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.--Ephesians 5:21-33

Stay positive!

that was the message of church today to stay positive and be holy because at the end its worth being in god's kingdom or believing in the lord! there is a story in the bible how a man who was on a wheel stair waited 38 years for a miracle.... 38 years thats the majority of his life! after 38 days or hours the majority of people would give up!!!! its because every year god sent an angel to a lake and whoever went into the lake first... would be cured of all his sickness or disease so forth... so that man waited for 38 yrs because one does not know when the angel would appear, however; other people waited and who could walk... would cure themselves instead of helping the man that could not walk.... but that man kept his faith and kept waiting... so one day jesus walked to the lake and saw this man and saw his faith (38 YEARS!!!!) and asked him, what is it that you want... he said to be cured and be able to walk... and with jesus holy words that man walked!!!!! and i'm pretty sure he said it was worth waiting for the lord!!! this is what we have to do... stay positive especially when we have challenges and keep on praisin the lord because when we are finally with him in his kingdom... we are def going to say it was worth waiting for our lord!!!! may god bless you :o)

:o)

so i went to church tonite and i feel like everything they were singing, praising the lord, and preaching it was god talking to me!!! they were saying how the people who make glass, put the glass through fire to mold it to it place... so basically the fire are the challenges us human have to go through to be more christ-like! and my challenge now is to get to grad school at uf even if i have people tellin me that i cant and it hurts. another thing that they sang about was that everything is god's will not mine or yours but god's! so if it's god will for me to get to grad school it will happen and if it doesnt happen, then it was not god's will and i have to accept that! because everything we do has to be to please god and what more can we give him if he created us!!! another thing is to love the people who hurt u and not wish them that same hurt that u received because not everyone is the same and some may not be able to handle the challenges you can so they might get into depression and might even commit suicided. so always pray that whoever hurts you does not suffer like you did. jesus suffered for us and yet he still prayed for us and loves us so it is only fair for us to love those who hurt us! so even though i think that lady was mean and other bad words i should pray for her and wish her only the best! because to know god is to know how to love others!!! and remember that yes we are sinner but we have good in is because god is good and is here now and for eternity!!!! and he was here before the devil and he will still be here after the devil is gone so remember that u have good in u!!! :o) may god bless you

:o(

so today i went to the psychology building to see wat requirements i need to be accepted at grad school since i'm majoring in criminology but i want to be a child psychologist! so the lady was completely negative! she was like no u wont get accepted cuz u need at least a 3.8 gpa.... i have a 2.97 so now i want to drop out of school thanks lady!!! and i need a 1400 on the gre wat the hell?!??! i want to go into counseling talking to a child... not freaking discovering a new species, its not like i'm going to med or genetics!!!! and then she was like even if u r a hispanic it does not matter cuz there r a million hispanics in uf! she was just negative about everything... she was supposed to be a psychologist and know how to talk to people to not make them want to die or feel like a failure!!! but u know wat lady... god is on my side so if its his will i will get accepted and numbers wont matter cuz all i ever wanted to be is a psychologist! :o) may god bless u!

AMEN

Bible Study

i'm so excited cuz my friend Adlai and Derwin's aunt Mara are going to come to my house every thursday to have bible studys and i am very excited about it especially since i have soooo much questions and i need to start making god #1 in my life! :o) God wants to touch me, i know and i want to be touched by him!!! i want to crave him, want him, desire his love more than anything else! and i do love him every much and god thank you for always answering my prayers!!! :o) may god bless you as he has blessed me :O)

StReSsEd!!!

so how about last nite i had nightmares over and over again about my paper and how horrible i did and about stupid research variables! basically i need a break from school and I'M SICK!!! i got rain on thurs and fri so now i have a bad cold and the biggest headache!!! :o( i need my mommy!!!

Test Monday

another stupid test on monday... just had one on thurs, one today, and one on monday because of the stupid test i couldnt go to miami and did i mention i have a stupid paper due on tues!!! so please pray for my success on my exam this monday... thank you :o) and dont forget to watch prison break, heroes, and journey man lol

CPR CERTIFIED

thats right ppl i am cpr certified so if u r ever choking, drowning, blooding, hurt etc... i can help save ur life... but if u were ever mean to me... then FORGET IT!! LOL :P

UF?!?!?!?!

so i started thinking.... i love living in gainesville and i love the high springs church and i love the ppl here and if i applied at uf for graduate school i would not have to stress soo much for moving to texas so i'm gonna do it and apply at uf and also at texas and wherever i see an opportunity but hopefully i get accepted somewhere... i really dont want to be rejected and i do want to further my education!!! and finally be a psychologist!!! pray for me please!!! :o)

This is the essay for UF... help!!! lol
(Please explain your reasons for graduate study, including your current degree goals as well as your reasons for selecting a particular field for graduate study.)

Miracle!!!

i have called a million and one book stores lookin for a book i need to read for my test (which is on monday)... i went to three diff stores all of them saying sorry we r sold out... the only store left to call i was praying to god please i need this book... and there is only one copy left!!! wit my name on it! luz is gonna pick me up and take me to get my book... thank god for always blessing me i love you :o)

on amazon the book was $11 but to be ship tomorrow it was $18 so a total of $29 for a 11 dollar book... crazyness!!!

TESTS!!!

i'm wondering.... did all my teachers get together and decide lets give tania a test every week?!?!? I THINK SO! its sad cuz every single week i have to study for a test! i was going to go to miami this weekend but my test moved my test from this past monday to this upcomin monday so now i cant go. and i'm sad cuz i wanna see my mom and i wanted to go to this youth event the church is having at miami this weekend.... but school sucks! i just came out of another test a lil while ago... if the teacher would ask me all the definitions i would be perfect... but he always has to word it weird and give stupid examples... makes my life more complicated!!! but the good thing is that tonight is UGLY BETTY AND THE NEW SEASON OF THE OFFICE YAY FOR ME!!! HOWEVER.... tomorrow i have another major exam to see if i get certified in cpr... watch out ppl tania is gonna save ur life!!! and ur children too!! lol

TeXaS

i'm sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo nervous!!!!! ok so yesterday i had a mental breakdown and started thinking.... where are we gonna live in texas....how are we gonna move all our things... how can we afford it.... will i even get in graduate school at the university of houston?!?!? i'm so nervous and nobody has the answers to any of these questions?!?!? now i dont wanna be a grown up!!!....MOMMY!!! lol hopefully my lord can answer all my questions :o)

The Socket!

this is a reason why NO ONE SHOULD PUT THEIR FINGER IN THE SOCKET!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA she is my sorority sister renita trying to be funny and she would KILL me if she found out that i put this pic up here....so good thing she doesnt have the link to my blog hahahahahahaha anyways everyone please learn from renita lol (renita if u ever read this....i was just trying to educate ppl and i love u!!! lol ) :P

Apple Pies

i know its very early but i'm very excited for thanksgiving cuz i'm going to miami to see my mommy but i'm so excited cuz i'm gonna try to bake AN APPLE PIE!!! and buy some vanilla ice cream ummm YUMMY!!! i also want to bake cup cakes or a regular cake....BAKE YES...COOK NO!!! LOL i can make rice lol. i really want this thanksgiving to be special because its going to be my family and the man of my life together having dinner so i'm super happy and excited and i need advise on what would be the perfect dinner....no turkey my mom doesnt like it....so its gonna be chicken! but i cant wait!!!

Helena

Helena i wanted to say that i admire you for being a good mother and always putting jayden first. i admire your courage to have responsibilities to another life besides just yours and a lot of women could not have done it but u did and now he brings u soo much joy so i'm very happy for u because its a very non-selfish thing u do everyday :o) (and u know wat i mean lol)

Tuesdays

so i love tuesday cuz its time i get to spent wit my biggie its our day of the week...its the only day that she has time for me but its nice....we have lunch together and watch HEROES! yes i got her hooked and i dont mind watching it again!!! so biggie i love our day!! :o) and i'm glad we r spending time together! hoy y siempre

Birthdays

it has been everyone's birthday.... my cousin Idania on the 20th, my cousin Valeska on the 25th, my mom's on Thursday, my dad and my friend Adlai today and it gets me thinking....i wish it was MY birthday!!! dont get me wrong i def dont want to get old but i want that special attention from everyone: "Happy birthday tania" and me saying thank u with a smile on my face knowing yes today is my day lol.... and some flowers from the hubby i wouldnt mind and eating some cake sounds good...maybe even opening up a present or two...why wouldnt people want it to be their birthdays?!?! cuz i do!!!! lol maybe i'm just selfish and greedy and i want it all to be about me...or maybe i just like cake! speaking of which i wanna bake some cupcakes...anyone interested?!?! but the problem is when its someone else birthday....i never know wat to get someone its so hard to know if it will please them (whats wat she said hahaha-from the show the office) especially when it comes to my mom birthday...that woman is so picky and she can buy herself anything she wants...but lately she has gotten into poetry and quotes so i bought her a beautiful journal so she could write them all down... then i'm stressing about it now, i dont know what to get derwin...last yr i got him this game called WOW worst mistake ever...so this time i dont want to make the same mistake like getting him an upgrade to wow lol so help me ppl...wat can i get my man for his birthday and x-mas?!?!?! and help me celebrate my birthday again...cuz when its derwin's birthday i say its mine too! lol

Online?!?!?

what is there to do online?!?!? i check my facebook, myspace, my webmail, sometimes my webct but then wat?!?!?! what to do? especially when there are no comments, no new updates, no new gossip...wat is there to do online?!?! i can plan a trip...but have no money, i can see what movies have came out...but i seen them all.... i can DO NOTHING!!! there really isnt much to do online except when u need research for a paper....but then i'm upset that i have a paper due!!! i can start playing WOW like derwin but not a very big fan of online games, video games, so now i'm writing this blog because there really isnt much to do online that wont take more than ten mins...is this why i check facebook and myspace numerous times a day...am i an addict?!?! NO i'm just bored and there is nothing to do online....

except when my mommy or helena are on msn messager, they give me something to do until my mom computer freezes, or helena has to do her mommy thing...when what is there to do?!?!?! HELP ANYONE...WHERE SHOULD I GO?!!?!?! or should i just stick to being a couch potato?!?!?! there is also only soo many re-runs of the shows on vh1 that i can watch... luckly I Love New York 2 is coming next monday but my dilema is that its the same time as my mondays shows which i mentioned in the previous blog... i'll catch the re-run!!!

CONCLUSION: my previous blog and this one have just been about complaints...maybe i'm in a naggin mood or maybe i have complaints how the internet is whack and i cant stop writing on this blog lol ONCE AGAIN i blame helena and david for making me get a blog but maybe unconsciencely they figure out what is there to do online....WRITE ON UR BLOG!!! random thoughts from me :o)

Breaks Suck!!!

in between breaks before ur next class suck especially if ur first class ended at 12:35pm and ur next one starts at 4pm!!!!! i been waiting at the library studying for my test this thurs (pray and light candles for me please) but there is only soo much studying one can do without getting bored!!! plus there are always random ppl walking around, some look weird lol some look nerdy, some just look lost lol others look like me....SLEEPY!!! anyways the good news is that today is monday which means that at 8pm starts Prison Break, at 9pm starts Heroes, and at 10pm starts Journery Man, believe it or not yes monday is my busy day...wit all these shows to watch!!!! mondays has its good things and bad....school starts all over again but also do my shows!!! :o)

How time flies by...

Its so crazy how time flies by!!!!! it felt like just yesterday when derwin and i meet each other again through myspace now we have been together for a yr and almost five months and we have been living together for almost a yr!!! i am graduating in may (god willing) and HELENA HAS A BABY!!!! (who is over 3 months old!) I remember when i had just found out that she was pregnant and man it felt like FOREVER until jayden was born....but now he is gonna be 4 months old (TIME FLIES!!!) sadly i still have not seen him yet but pics r great. MI MONA IS MARRIED!!! my monkey is all grown up and a wife! and loves now living in tennessee and next yr hopefully i am moving to TEXAS!!! its sad to say but wow i'm turning old...my next birthday i will be 22 then its all down hill after that!!!! and even though everyone has new lives, helena a mommy, and ana a wife, i still remember when we all went to disney for my birthday and had an amazing time!!!!

Thank You Derwin

baby i want to say thank you for always being there for me, for making me a better person, and finding out what real love is all about, thank u for being MY INSPIRACION!!! thanks to you i have been doing better in school, thanks for helping and supporting me in lossing 22 pounds, but most importantly thank you for helping me find GOD. i didnt believe in him or wondered why did he forget about me, but now i realized that this whole time he was holding on to me, i just kept walking away from him. i feel so much happier now, drinking going clubbing isnt for me anymore, listening to CASTING CROWNS makes me happy (even a lot better than sex on the beach lol) but mi amor you really do complete me even if it sounds cheesy!!! i cant sleep without u, thats y i wait until u get out of the comp, i love waking up wit u even wit ur morning breathe lol and even if i complain about going downstairs to lock the door when u go to work, it feels amazin when u hold me and kiss me and tell me u love me before u go to work. and thanks for not givin up on me cuz i can be naggy or bratty and i can get on anyone nervous but u love me so thank u because i love u too and cant see my life without u.

Helena's Fault

i basically got this because of helena lol i really dont know what to write about i am more of ask and i'll tell lol sooooooooooooooooo yea lol ummm go see the kingdom it was a good movie and it made me want to learn more about different religions and look up to see why killing yourself gives you 7 or 70 virgins?!?! so what i learned was that muslims do believe in just ONE GOD and they call god "Allah" which is interesting cuz i thought they believed in many gods. well enough about religious stuff dont want to get into too much trouble here...

helena: how do i write to the blog from my phone?